By: Blonde Two

I discovered a few things about myself during my recent trip to Northern Norway. One of them was that even if you are living in a van, with someone you know very well, there will come a point when you realise that you are too smelly to avoid a proper wash any longer. I adopted several unusual personal hygiene methods and Mr B2 went for one eminently sensible one. So here are 3 methods of keeping clean while camping (somewhere very cold!) See which one you prefer!

1. Wash your hair in a fjord
I used this method twice (apparently hair doesn’t need as much washing as bodies do) and it only requires 4 ingredients. Some hair, a fjord, some shampoo (preferably eco-friendly) and the ability to shampoo very fast whilst shivering. I have no idea of actual water temperature but on my ‘ice-cream head’ register it was the coldest I have ever felt (despite swimming in the UK sea all winter). Dipping my head in once was painful enough but having to then put it back in again long enough to remove the shampoo was even more breath-taking.

2. Have a snow wash
I like to think that I invented this but I am sure that snow explorers before me have discovered the cleansing properties of the white chilly stuff. I had several snow washes over the 9 days and feel that, by the finish, I had perfected the art. All you need for this one is some smelly areas, a pile of snow, a dress and some shower gel. Take a handful of snow, squirt a bit of shower gel onto it, rub the combination in the appropriate smelly area and utter some choice words. The key with this one is not to use too much shower gel. If you do you will be forced to go for at least 2 additional personal freezing moments to affect a rinse. You might be wondering what the dress was for… well you have to remember that we were often camped by the roadside, it is easy to wash armpits without provoking too much attention but there are some things a girl wants to keep at least vaguely private(s)!

3. Melt some snow and wash in the camper
I always said that Mr B2 is a sensible chap (mainly for marrying me). He proved this by opting each morning for a nice, inside and warm wash with snow that had been melted to a decent temperature. He still got to utilise the snow but avoided risking frostbite where a bloke really doesn’t want it. He was even gentlemanly to make sure that there was some left over for coffee.

As we come to the end of our June heatwave I find myself longing for snow and a bit of a snow wash or a dip in a freezing fjord. Next time there is a whiteout up on Dartmoor and you see a Blonde standing in a car park wearing a dress and wielding a bottle of shower gel, you’ll know what is going on!