By: Blonde Two
As you know Mr B2 does a fair amount of cycling. He is doing even more at the moment because he is training for, what I can only describe as a ‘scary biking marathon’, otherwise known as the Bear Bones 200 (if you feel like cycling an unknown distance across some of the most ridiculous terrain that Wales has to offer, on a bike loaded up with camping kit, then find out more here).
Generally speaking, Mr B2’s navigation is good (all in the Blonde training you know), he uses a GPS for his Welsh rides with a map and compass for backup (which he usually has to put to use a couple of times). However recently, whilst cycling around the hills (we have plenty) and lanes of Torbay he has twice managed to navigate himself straight into bees. These bees have not responded gently to the interruption to their daily routine and have let him know their displeasure through the application of a sting.
As far as we know Mr B2 has never before shown signs of allergy to bee stings, but on both these occasions, he has arrived home itching and with the most impressive sets of lumps and bumps all over his body. Once he has taken antihistamine, these start to disappear but the swelling around the sting site takes a few days.
The latest sting was on the top of his forehead and the related swelling has given some strange effect (apart from my referring to him as a Klingon). He has a rather lined forehead and is one of the only people I know who can form a perfect square with his frown lines. Since the bee sting, these lines have all but disappeared and he looks as though someone has performed some type of Botox treatment on him. Botox is a poison, which acts by paralysing muscles (why somebody thought using it on wrinkles was a good idea I really don’t know).
We think we have discovered a revolutionary new alternative to Botox, which gives the same results but only requires one injection. Mr B2 currently has no lines on his forehead and looks far more youthful than his 50 years suggest. We are going to christen our new facial treatment Beetox!
Please note: reactions to stings can be a sign of anaphylaxis and should be taken very seriously. The NHS has some advice about when to seek medical help with insect bites and stings.