By: Blonde Two
On Friday night, I had to do an embarrassing bit of sewing. One of the seams of my favourite walking trousers had split around the derriere – around tout le derriere (suspicion of poor French here) in fact. There is no way that I can throw them away, as well as being my favourite, they are a size smaller than my usual effort and they make my aforementioned derriere look pretty good. No, my bum does not look big in this!
I think that the damage has happened because I have been sliding down rocks too often. This is not through choice but because I am becoming braver about scrambling up rocks. A thing to be celebrated, I am sure you will agree, but then I realise that my knees won’t do the reverse route without making major complaint. At this point, unless there is a big bloke handy to lean on (there never is), bottom sliding becomes the only way down. This is obviously sudden death to the sensitive trouser seam.
I am hoping that my trouser surgery will help me to keep my dignity for a while longer. In the meantime, just in case a gap should appear at an inopportune moment, I will stop wearing those bright red bloomers.