By: Blonde Two

When you are a Two Blonde, weekends are more often than not for expeditions. It is an easy to understand system which goes a bit like this:

1) Walk somewhere (Saturday).
2) Camp somewhere (Saturday).
3) Walk somewhere else (Sunday).
4) Go home and panic about the week ahead (Sunday).

All this is very simple, but we Blondes hit a problem when we have expeditions in the middle of the week (as we do next week). It is a very Blonde problem; we can’t cope with day one not being Saturday and day two not being Sunday, we have tried very hard to do so but it just confuses us.

To avoid all sorts of things going wrong, for example, going home and panicking on Saturday morning, we have come up with a very simple Blonde system. Every expedition, be its start on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday, is labelled as though it were the weekend. So for example, this week’s Wednesday/Thursday expedition has been relabelled so that Wednesday is Saturday and Thursday is Sunday.

For some strange reason, nobody else seems to understand our system, so we have to be careful to revert to the correct days when we are talking to anyone else.

You might be wondering why I haven’t mentioned Friday. That is because Friday is for eating carbohydrates in preparation for the weekend/not-weekend’s walking and drinking alcohol to recover from the week that has just gone. We like to do that on as many days of the week as possible!