By: Blonde Two
Wikipedia claims that the phrase Ladies Who Lunch refers to “well-dressed women who meet for social luncheons.” I am very excited about this definition because Blonde One has reliably (she is the most reliable person I know) informed me that today, the Two Blondes are going to be “Blondes Who Lunch” (note the capital letters which refer to the fact that this is quite an event)! I don’t think I have ever had a “luncheon” before unless you can count the pink stuff from my childhood which came in a tin and had the word “meat” after it and I am very much looking forward to it (the luncheon, not the meat). I am fairly certain that “luncheon” is neither a squashed sandwich crouched under a Dartmoor tor nor an enormous plate of cheesy chips at Foxtor Cafe which are the two things we are most used to sharing.
Not only are we “luncheoning” (nice to note that this is actually a real word) but we are also “coffeeing”, “art gallerying” and “shop-ping”! I am a bit worried about the “shop-ping” bit because we will undoubtedly end up in outdoor shops together and our over inflated propensity to spend in these shops is certain to multiply in some strange exponential way if we are in one at the same time!
The “coffeeing” should be fine unless Blonde One gets the urge to order a cup of hot Ribena instead. I am not sure what I will do if this happens – maybe order two coffees for myself and sneak one under her nose! I am certainly not going to order slightly metallic, luke warm tea.
The “art-gallerying” is where Dartmoor comes into the picture – let’s face it, it had to somewhere for the Two Blondes. We are going to look at an exhibition of Widgery (William and FJ) paintings. I think I am going to have to work quite hard to stop Blonde One from trying to steal one as she is a big fan. I am hoping that we don’t lose our ladylike cool and start pointing and tor naming as we see paintings of places that we recognise.
I hope that you Blondees and Blondettes have noticed that I have used some big, posh words in this post. This was to help me practice being a “lady” – I have a feeling that places that sell “luncheon” will only sell it to you if you can use words that nobody else understands. Now where are my pearls and tiara?