By: Blonde One

Blonde Two has asked the question ‘how long is a walk?’ and I am now asking ‘how deep is a bog?’. To some extent both questions can be answered with ‘how long is a piece of string?’ Both things are difficult to define but to some are extremely important. The Two Blondes have often discussed both topics without coming up with a satisfactory answer. That is until Blonde One partly discovered the depth of one particular bog! The ‘bog’ question has been given a constant amount of airing on our walks and was a frequent source of wonder. Whilst precariously walking on bouncy ground covered in bright green vegetation we have thought long and hard about the wisdom of ‘walking on water’ and considered what might happen if we fell through the vegetation. After a very long walk (by anyone’s standards) Blonde One kindly obliged and fell into a bog! It was not a very pleasant experience in lots of ways, but as far as experiments go it was successful. I went in right up to my thigh and as those of you that know me will testify, my legs are quite long! Therefore we have come to the conclusion that bogs are quite deep and should not be ventured into at any cost. Another unpleasant discovery after going ‘bog dipping’ was the fact that these bogs absolutely stink to high heaven! I was not a very nice companion (either walking, driving, or drinking in the pub after) due to the smell of rotting vegetation that surrounded me.

Blonde Two has recently discovered some advice for removing yourself from a bog: apparently you should fall forwards onto your face to remove yourself! I can’t think of anything worse and if I were you I would not take this advice at any costs. After I had got my 2 walking companions to stop laughing at my plight, I did manage to persuade them to pull me out. This is by far a much better way of getting out of a bog!