By: Blonde Two
Blonde One claims that she has an allergy to numbers. The odd thing though is that, although I have an A Level in maths, she can always add up route times much more quickly than me. I, on the other hand am much better at multiplying by 1.5 than she is (if you walk 900 metres then it takes 9 x 1.5 minutes to get there if you walk at 4km an hour). Please don’t laugh, multiplying by 1.5 can be very hard when you are cold, wet and giggly.
I do, if you haven’t been completely turned off by the word “maths” by now, have some theories about the number two that seem to be relevant to the Two Blondes;
1. The number two is the only even prime number (think about it – it makes sense). This makes it very special, so much so, that it is sometimes called the “oddest prime”. I think we can safely say that the Two Blondes are both in their prime and a little bit on the odd side.
2. Another interesting (or did I see you yawning then) fact is that the square root of two was the first known irrational number (endless decimal might be a way of explaining this). In other words, it goes on and on and on and on … You may have noticed that the Two Blondes go on and on and on and on about Dartmoor but we are clearly not in the slightest bit irrational.
3. Two squared is four. When you extrapolate (good word but not sure if I have used it in the right place) this, you can see that a new universal equation becomes true;
Blondes to the power of Two = more Blondes than you started with or B1 x B2 = 4B
All this really does indicate that the Two Blondes were meant to be together. Not only that, but if we stick together, we will be odder, more in our prime, more irrational and more powerful than we ever were before. This might explain the exclamation that was heard as we walked into a particularly long-Blonde-suffering office today to hear the cry, “Oh my God, there are two of you!” (and these particular people don’t even know that we are Two and we are Blonde!)