By: Blonde Two
Anyone who has grown-up offspring will recognise that moment of realisation when you finally understand that they are adults. For me, an example of this would be when, at the sight of steam still emitting from my bonnet (car not hat), after a trip around the supermarket, Not-at-all-Blonde instructed me, “Take the trolley back Mum, I’ll deal with this.”
I had another moment like that yesterday, but with other people’s offspring. The Two Blondes were out on Dartmoor doing some rather chilly Ten Tors training when we were faced with a bit of a medical dilemma. Little-Miss-Blonde and Young Leader J saved the day and allowed the group to walk on, by walking back off the moor to the car park and moving a vehicle around to our next “near the road” point.
Nothing complicated, but for me, it was the realisation at the end of the day, that we had asked adults for help and adults had responded.
A lovely moment of realisation. Thank you Little-Miss-Blonde and Young Leader J (I hope you read this one day) for the privilege of seeing you grow up and thank you for your support. A complete pleasure, as always, to work with you.
It’s unfortunate that the quote you use ends with “men”. Not just for feministic reasons but because I believe the growing-up process for women differs significantly from that for men. For one things it starts earlier – young girls playing with dolls appear to be concentrating, measuring what is happening, somehow aware that the awful responsibilities of motherhood are a distinct possibility. Whereas boys… well, let’s not go into that.
You describe a daughter-to-mother experience and salute it appropriately. A daughter-to-father experience deserves even more attention. Macho males may like to pretend it isn’t happening, that it can’t happen. But during the last few holidays in the Languedoc and the visit to Stuttgart just before Christmas I’d have been dishonest if I hadn’t acknowledged the smooth transition of authority. And been grateful for it.
Not everyone accepts parenthood with good grace especially if it happens by accident. And it is, after all, a long haul. Does it in fact ever end? But looking back on two or three decades which frequently were only a whisker away from being iffy it is is a pleasure so gradual you hardly know it’s happening to recognise that some damn thing must have gone right even if you’re not sure what. And ask the question: do I deserve this? Something that comes under the heading already discussed: good luck.
That was a graceful post, Blonde Two
Thank you. It is, as you say, good to find out that you have done something right.
You are giving these Young Leaders a rich experience. In years to come they will be well-supported by the spirit and strength you have fostered in them.